Thursday, 5 December 2013

Dating- an almost lost past time.

Today I'm going to talk about everyone's most loved and hated topic. Dating. Dating is an art form- men will say its simple but then they won't be able to justify why they rejected someone they flirt with, are attracted to and enjoy spending time with- but they do this. I'm certainly no genius especially since I'm single but doesn't dating begin on the premise of interest?

The dating scene is different now to years ago. Courtship is now only present in Jane Austen novels; holding a door open is only for men who don't fear feminists and women well if they could explain everything by rules we'd all be hitched by now. Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat really all make dating or attempting to so fickle and without effort. So where's the interest?

Like everything if you're interested you invest in it. TIME. Yes people show love through various forms of the five love languages but this is one thing that is universal. Time is something that no person can get back. I guess this is where you are expecting the usual ra-ra about making sure you spend your time with people worthy of it. Don't worry I'm not going there, I'm completely aware that people already have their Facebook news feeds scattered with suggestive memes about the choices we should be making. Instead here's what I want to say; dating gets as interesting as we want it to based on the invested interest we cultivate with those we are spending our time with.

Sounds simple right? As I said before I'm definitely no expert, even in the past I have enjoyed the easier things as opposed to the right things. All of us do and then we wonder where did the spark go? Right now I'm sitting beside 2 people who have clearly been married for a while, they are sharing a meal. Conversation? None. It gets me wondering in all my single-dom dating know-how (cough cough what hilarity) why two people choose to go out and not communicate. I mean I completely understand how great the feeling is when you are in someone's company and neither of you feel the need to talk but when one part attempts conversation and the other responds with an overflowing answer of 'yes' or 'no' you can understand how dinner suddenly hurls into an argument of buts and wells.

This is how I see the scene...isn't invested interest saving your cashola and dealing with the issues you have then having a romantic dinner where you are dressed in better attire than your gardening clothes and both parties can't wait till the front door of the house opens again? Or am I speaking too simply? Either way the more I see couples, especially that have ages together the more I feel they have forgotten their greatest blessing. To love and be loved in return. After all there's plenty of people still waiting for their salt to their pepper, the sweet to their sour who are wishing a person with courage, humour and a kind heart would stand up.

So here's the challenge this Christmas season- don't just spice up your date night; spice your conversation up. Don't just be there in the room, let the other person know what your communicating across a room without speaking (other than cheeky favours) and don't just make time and think your job is done.

If your single why not take a chance? Who wants to known as no-balls Barry? Or heartless Harriet? Flirt, make people enjoy your company and not your pants because when that's gone that's one shit conversation.

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