Sunday, 10 January 2016

The eternal sleep

Have you ever watched someone sleep? Sitting on the train seeing a Jamaican English lady face to the outward skies as her head tilts back, mouth ajar. The crease lies don't exist on her face but I know the kind of story that has lead to her peacefully, exasperated state on public transport.

Effort after effort, travel from a to b constantly, trying to do whatever you can to keep everything together and everyone around you happy. Heavy bags in hand, now at last resting underfoot until the rest must end, her stop comes and the journey must begin again.

In October 2014 I saw my grandfather take his last breaths it was something that really upset me and being back in the UK where he lived the first 30years of his life makes it worse. We shared memories of times enjoyed in the same places across London in the UK merely generations apart, it's one of the most beautiful things we ever got to share in our relationship while he was on this earth. It has just really struck me now that this profound rest a lady on a train had for a few moments is what my Grandfather was wishing for for a few years, after years of an amazingly intelligent mind and a body that left him feeling trapped, incapable of expressing to his full capacity the beautiful mind he had. It is in this moment right now, looking at this beautifully peaceful sleep, that I learn everything we want is granted, even in death. Such an amazing grace need not be thought of with tears of sadness but smiles of joy.

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