What's your number one?

Yesterday I wrote about how consciously choosing no New Years resolution helped make 2015 a better year for me however I am not a cookie cutter thinker not writer, if you need a good ole New Years Reso to help get things in check start here. Priorities.

Priorities are possibly one of the most detested words in the English language because it has a negative connotation attached to it that somehow we haven't been doing what's most important however, that's more about society not individuals.

A priority is something we place with high importance, above other things based on our values and beliefs. It is therefore not always understood why individuals prioritise one thing over another, but it doesn't have to be understood- priorities are personal.

For 2016 if your making a New Years resolution I urge you to consider what your priorities are, reflect on them and decide whether or not you got it right in 2015. This is not to beat the crap out of yourself but simply to ensure you don't let other things fall off the bandwagon by focussing on something that may be temporarily important. Too many people focus on working out or getting that promotion that they forget about quality time with their partners. Life is always best when we have balance so think about how you will order your priorities and make time for things that matter most to you now. Make sure you leave downtime as a space within your newly scheduled year because running out of time and not allowing yourself time to rest is the quickest way to ensure you feel a sense of failure sooner than you are capable of. If you have 20 priorities have a rethink- are there really 20 super important things that you MUST do now?

 

Furthermore, think about the things that you can and cannot change. Many of us want to prioritise completing things 100% of the time at work (for example) but we forget that we are evaluating this priority in a vacuum. If your workplace simply mounds and mounds work and doesn't leave time to actually get things completely done you aren't going to achieve that priority so change your target. It might feel like your doing the wrong thing but honestly you can't work to get 100 things done at once everyday at an outstanding level. If you try you'll end up with a nervous breakdown or sick 3 weeks into the new year. Be realistic. The same goes for your fitness goals. Don't slam yourself at the gym 7 days a week if you have no life other than work and gym, because it isn't going to make you happy even when you have that body you want. Again, be realistic.

 

Most importantly though if you are setting a New Year's Resolution think about how you want to feel and the end of the year. New Years resolution or not (see yesterday's post), you want to be able to reflect on a year gone by that was successful from the get go, that showed the change you wanted to achieve and how you maintained the other things in your life that are important to you.

 

New Year's Resolutions are mocked all the time, let's face it but there is no reason why you cannot achieve what you want to, it's all up to your mindset. If you want to achieve it you can. So go ahead, make one and come back and write to me how you are achieving it in 2016, I'd love to hear from you!

 

Till next time...

 

Jules

WARNING: explicit motivational material with expletives.

 

 

You're in shock right? It is true I am definitely not the usual 'f bomber' especially online but it is that time of year when everyone cuts to the chase, gets philosophical and pours their heart out, filling our news feeds with momentary gratitude and Everest-like motivation. Now is the easiest time to switch off and hide all the mushiness of the season from our timelines but before you do I urge you to read this.

2015 was a different year for me. It began when I didn't make a New Years resolution. Instead I consciously decided to continue doing what I knew brought me happiness- achieve success, chase goals and enjoy every moment. This non-resolution made my year the most complete yet.

It started in January when I said goodbye to some friends I had made across a host of nations as I bid farewell to the Topdeck heroes of my Winter Getaway tour. I had a couple of days rest and randomly decided to pick a bucket list country and 'just go'. It was blissful. I ended up in a 4.5star hotel in Brussels overlooking the main square of the city, a chocolate parlour, waffles and diamonds on my doorstep. Six days later after further letting go, more than I ever had, I left London with so many positive memories and a superb start to my year. When I returned home I realised that as much as I loved being near my family I had outgrown my current life. So I did what I've never done before nor what I planned, I hedged bets and 12weeks later moved to London again. Thinking about that now makes me smile so much because I know how much gumption it took and how happy it made me feel. The turn around from a 6week eurotrip to living abroad was so short but I did it. I made a promise to myself that I would keep making decisions for my own happiness.

I continued to make decisions like these this year. It certainly wasn't the easiest year living in London. But because I focused on the positives and decided to cut out anything that didn't serve my happiness I got through the year happy. 99% of people I'm very close with will not know what my year entailed nor am I willing to share it but I am pleased to say through everything I managed to find peace and an unimaginable strength within myself. Apparently how I feel is shown on the outside because people on the street stop me to say 'wow you are a really happy person'. The funny thing is most of those people would probably assume my life is easy but in fact it's conquering the hardships that make me happiest.

Each year life asks the silent question of us, what did you do this year? I want to ask you, were you happy this year? You have the power to change it all. You can only rely on yourself for happiness, at the end of 2016 will you be proud of what you have become in a year or will you have wanted to be more?

Forgive people, be humble and allow yourself to find a positive in the most painful of memories and you will have nothing more to ask of yourself when the question beckons. You will be even more complete than you have before.

Enjoy your time before New Year's Day my lovelies, till next time...

 

 

Sorry about the language but sometimes we just need to cut to the chase & please ourselves. Be happy.



2015...a special Christmas

 

Three years ago on Christmas Eve I said goodbye to my family and flew to London to live. It was a 27 hour flight I had never taken before & a new kind of lifestyle ahead and with no family connections.

To make my journey smoother my lovely mother and sister gifted me with little flight care packages. My mum 27 scratch and win tickets, one for each hour of flying and my sister 27 little presents just to keep me in the Christmas spirit. It was so entertaining that during the time spent circling above Heathrow on Christmas morning I had to rush to finish scratching and unwrapping the presents! (Mum and Dad always told us to appreciate our Christmas moments).

 

This year's Christmas tree :)

At 7am on Christmas Day I landed in London, presents in hand, excitement in heart and a huge amount of family love with me despite being hemispheres apart. To handle the jetlag as best as possible I walked from my apartment in Notting Hill to Kensington Gardens where I sat surrounded by vivacious squirrels and heard the excitement of British children running to the Princess Diana Memorial play park shouting 'Can we play yet Daddy?!' It instantly reminded me of home; children playing on Christmas day surrounded by family.

 

This year I was again away from home, in London, except this year is a super special year. I now know part of my English family I have never met, I have my old friends from years gone by and some brilliant new ones. But most of all I have  the same gifts (I purposely re bought them for myself) my family once gave me all three years ago when I first took the leap of faith and jumped ship, so it feels like they were right here with me. Every time I put my Mor Belladonna hand cream on I'm reminded of the flight instantly and how distance will never separate how close I am to my family. I guess until recently, when I started missing them again and for the first time in a while put on my hand  cream again did I realise that scent was a beautiful way to remember the true gift I have for Christmas and every day. To make things more special this Christmas my mother sent baubles all the way from Australia with each of my family member's names on them so I could decorate my tree. My friends and I joined together on Christmas day, sharing secret Santa gifts, laughing and bringing together a Christmas dinner pulled together by everyone playing their part. It was my version of the play park with family, my London family and it made this Christmas so very special.

 

Special baubles from my lovely mother delivered from Aus

 

My London 'family' for Christmas this year- a bunch of travelling orphans...and a whole lot of fun!

 

To all my readers, I trust you enjoyed your Christmas. I hope you cherish the old and the new, recognize the real gifts of Christmas and find a way to keep them in your heart, not just on Christmas but all year long.

Julia

 

 

 

 

 

What are you looking for?

Hello! Its great to be back writing to you again! Today I want to talk to you about the question we are always asked:

What are you looking for?

I have written on many occasions about the purpose of a positivity driven lifestyle and how that creates opportunities beyond belief. I have also written about how it is important to go after what you want. The irony is life always challenges us after we have shown confidence. These hurdles become a measuring stick for assessing whether 'what your looking for' is still the same thing. Do you still yearn for that thing, person, lifestyle, career, body shape you had before? If you don't...what next?

In essence the message is the same, try and not lose faith, remain positive. As I have said before life is always about the silver linings. We must look for them. There is no harm in deciding that what you once had no longer serves you but at some point you will need to stop and assess how far you have travelled. You will need to decide whether you are happy with the distance you have travelled holistically or whether you want more and if that means moving on.

In the past 6 weeks everything in my life has constantly begged the same question again and again, 'what do you want?' It is like life is screaming it at me, begging me to yell back the answer however I don't have all the answers right now. The frustration has lead to random bursts of tears and an overall lack of motivation and all the while I have forgotten up until today one vital thing- nothing happens while you're stationary.

This applies to everything. If you are not trying to follow your dreams, be creative, chase the career you want, put yourself out there for a partner, improve your relationships, be committed to  your health then you can't expect silver linings to happen. The sad reality is if it takes as long as it has for me of late to grasp this concept you end up chasing negatives and never seeing the beautiful graces in things working out or, not working out. Everything does happen for a reason.

A few years ago I left London and I was saddened that it had to happen. I really didn't want to leave; returning this year and making things happen is one of the best things I have ever done. I didn't realise it at the time, because I said I was coming back for friends and more travel, but I had just allowed myself the opportunity to succeed at something I always thought I failed at and that was a gift I gave myself. Any time we pick ourselves up and try again we are betting on ourselves, we are saying we are worth it, we are picking our battles and deciding our best battle is with our own mentality.

Tomorrow I have been in London for 6 months. I look back on my time and I see wonderful travel, new career connections and some of the greatest friends I've had in my life. Even if the 'what am I looking for' question changes those silver linings will never be taken away and that's something to be grateful for everyday. So...to those special people in my life who supported me the past little while when I was struggling beyond belief thanks for being my silver lining, my little rays of sunshine.

I look forward to some more London writes with you all & sharing some exciting news. Until next time...

I want to be ridiculously in love with my life

The notion of being someone who loves every inch of their life is something everyone chases but how do you do it?

 

1. Forget the 'shoulds'

Do not do what society projects you need to be doing right now and just do what you want. If you listen to the shoulds it is only you that will be unequivocally upset with your life. You don't need to please anyone but yourself and what's more...you can't actually please anyone properly if you are pleasing a societal expectation that silently controls you. Live the life you want.

 

 

2. Choose the things in your life that make you, you and chase them with a mind full of goals

When you prioritise the pie pieces of your life what can you not live without? What 'hobbies' didn't you actively pursue every week? Cut those. It doesn't mean you don't love them it just means you can channel your love into a hobby that makes you well you. Here's an example- if I don't write, sing or exercise in a week I feel 'off' like I am not myself, when I reconnect with these things its like I am back, returned to Jules again. I crave these things. Massage, drawing even travel I love and thoroughly enjoy but if it didn't exist or I became incapable of doing them it wouldn't change me as a person. Comprehende?

 

 

3. Affirm your own awesomeness to yourself.

Write down your strengths and weaknesses and start immersing yourself in positive affirmations that make your weaknesses your strengths. Realise the vast qualities, talents and sills you have to offer others. If someone doesn't appreciate these there will be plenty of others who will so don't sweat it. If this part is more difficult for you get a healthy overdose of positive affirmations, litter your life with them by placing them everywhere in your house, workspace and that dreaded screen you look at.

 

 

4. Expect only the best.

It is true that our expectations are reflected in our results. Sometimes it can be highly frustrating knowing that you  have been waiting for a long time but the wait is always worth it. The amount of times people have told me I'm snobbish because I expect high qualities in others, men and businesses and that I don't budge on the fact is so frequent it is unable to be counted. However doing as others have suggested and settling for less has meant I never sacrificed my goals or my happiness. At 29 with a book just finished being written, living overseas for the second time, having travelled 15 countries and being in the possession of a job I love and am appreciated in whilst kicking some major personal goals I can't say I'm disappointed in my choice.

 

 

5. Take risks that scare you a little

The best way I can talk about this is to discuss my two competing loves; writing and helping children succeed. Whilst I love and always will, teaching, it is (especially if you never try for a promotion) a safe career where you are constantly stable. It pays the bills. Sadly, this fact alone means that the profession sees various lazy teachers who work uninspired and effectively demonstrate that they couldn't careless about the kids and for the most part it is a mission to let these lack lustre teachers go. In comparison creative careers like writing demand their workers to constantly evolve and take risks, it takes a leap of faith to get yourself and your work out their and noticed. It may mean infrequent pay cycles, work schedules and uncertainty but it may also come with great reward. Whatever the leap of faith in any career, for a promotion or otherwise, back yourself and your abilities, the absolute worst thing that can happen is you'll learn from it. So as Nike says...Just do it!

 

 

These five things are the simple secrets to successfully loving your life however there is one final, vital thing to remember. BE SELFISH. In a world driven by selfishness it is the epitome of irony that we don't place the importance on the right selfishness and that's the utter need to selfishly own our right to be happy- forget the possessions, be greedy and selfish about the things that will bring you lifelong lasting happiness. Most of all remember not to feel guilty about it, you are the one that lives your life and nobody else.

 

I hope this has helped some people who are looking to find a path they love instead of one they are on, it mightn't be an epic change it could mean a small tweaking. I hope that you find the courage to grant yourself your own happiness by chasing what you want. It really does make a world of difference. Since I've lived in London I've had a new lease on life, people (even those I don't know) constantly questioning my biological age when I tell them I'm actually not 24years old, I'm 5 years older, for me this is an one indication that how I feel on the inside is radiated on the outside and it all came to be from a few decisions. Happy Saturday lovelies.

 

Open your eyes...

Eyes wide open, brows raised and a cheeky, 'I did it' grin of confidence supported by a tall posture and an outward look. It's the look shown by someone who takes a punt on themselves and pursues their dreams. Whether you are 5, 25 or 70 the look doesn't change and neither does the effervescent feeling of being on top of the world. Sometimes described as the light bulb moment, when an individual finally discovers how bright they have made their own world by choosing to live for their passion.

 

 

Life is about passion. When we commit to doing things with passion we gain a zest for life we would otherwise miss out on. Everyone has that one thing they love to their very core that they know they would be different without but do we all live it?

 

Over the past 8 weeks or so I have been working on a project that would help me to discover what life would be like being paid to carry out my passion every day. I have written a book. This book is the very first of which I will publish myself and put on iBooks for viewers to read. I am a little nervous about it's success but I am super excited to be finally putting my name to something and taking the punt on myself in a larger fashion. As you are probably fully aware I am not a paid writer or blogger, I operate purely on the drive to publish (via posts) work that I feel gives an honest voice to an increasingly politically correct and bland society. Like authors of eras gone by I recognise that literature plays a pivotal role in societal change and whilst I might be one person that's all I need to be to affect change.

 

This is where The Pursuit of Greatness comes about. This book, currently in the final editing phase, shares how physical pursuits alter an individual for life making them more successful and fulfilled in all that they do. Largely based on my training, defeats and successes of Mt Everest, I feel that it will connect with any individual who is seeking to find an unstoppable mindset and healthy confidence for a lifetime. I look forward to sharing with you how the final days of this book comes together and how I feel about my journey as a soon to-be author.

 

 

Already I can tell you that I have thoroughly enjoyed committing time to my passion for writing and my passion for health, fitness and adventure. It hasn't really felt like work because I have fun doing it; even if my eyes feel like squares after editing the book 12 times or I've gone around in circles deciding which way I wanted to write the sentence only to write it the same way as I had it in the first instance!

 

The process has really got me thinking about how many people work everyday in a job they aren't passionate about. Please don't miss hear me, I love educating people in all walks of life and am very passionate about it however the dream job is to write books. At present I'm making it happen by taking a punt on my work and that alone feels great, therefore the success of the book is virtually irrelevant but what about those people who have no passion for what they do at all? In the United Kingdom the average working week is 48hours or 1344 hours per year provided you get your 4 weeks of annual leave each year. 1344 hours is a long time to be stuck in a job that you don't like especially when we know that health is directly related to our emotional state. Imagine if you could work 1344 days in a job you loved where you didn't count the hours, minutes, seconds of the work day? Where you weren't looking at Friday memes on Facebook from Tuesday lunchtime? Where you didn't feel like punching someone in the face for their idiotic management decision that was made without any input from the frontline workers? It would be pretty sweet wouldn't it. Well it only takes one thing. You.

 

 

Yes, you need to decide to take a punt on yourself, give yourself a go (as Aussies would say) and back that business idea that you've always had, take a chance on an idea you have and be prepared to get uncomfortable for a bit to increase your happiness. Kick those goals you always dreamt of achieving and walk to work with those eyes wide open, brows raised and a cheeky 'I did it' smile. There will be plenty of people ready to criticise but at the end of the day only you who will sit with regret in your mind. So get ballsy and make that passion you have your life. I dare you.

 

Till next time...

 

 

PS: To all my fellow writers.. never forget this...

 



The health and fitness lies you are fed

Yesterday I wrote about the need to eat well, exercise to show respect for your amazing body. The problem is many people pay attention to long standing fallacies that plague an industry with some pretty amazing minds. So here's a quick post to put a stop to the nonsense based on my study in health, anatomy and physiology, fitness programming, strength and conditioning.

A quick education into health and fitness

1. Fat is good. Well good fat is good.
Dose up on it. I'm talking nut oils, omega 3 fats that come from fish, avocado- all the very best foods. These foods will help improve your mood as well as help you lose weight.

2. Fat, protein, carbs- the chain of energy burning command.
This means that your body will burn fat first and then protein and so on. This is why people tell you to ease off on carbohydrates (like pasta) but carbohydrates are your friend you must have them in your diet. You just can't have a diet solely of carbs without an active lifestyle.

3. HIIT (high intensity interval training), tabata, Fartlek training and crossfit are your friend. They work on maximum effort in shorter bursts increasing thresholds (aerobic and anaerobic- movement with and without oxygen) whilst developing a range of muscle groups. These types of fitness are the forms you want to participate in to create a body transformation. Not regular straight, slow paced cardio. Ok? The bonus is these training methods fit perfectly with our time poor world (and over scheduled lives) and therefore leave no excuse for respecting our bodies and making that healthy change. Make it a priority.

4. The method of training purely dictates the physical outcomes.
If you complete exhaustion training (repetitions until failure) you will build muscular endurance and lean muscle mass. If  you work to intervals you will increase aerobic, anaerobic capacity, ability to clear lactic acid from the muscles and develop tone. If you do heavy weights with small repetitions focusing only on power and strength with long recovery periods in between you will be working to build your muscle and increase it's size. If you are running on a treadmill, riding your bike you will work your aerobic or lung capacity, maybe  your legs if you go fast enough or if you hit hills frequently at pace.

5. Women who lift weights will NOT end up looking like men. This is probably the biggest fallacy of them all. I'm not sure whether its simply weak minded men coming up with this notion or women who are scared they'll surprise themselves with how capable they truly are. Personally feeling strong physically is empowering in more ways than one and from experience, men (especially those with great character) do look at you differently and its not about your physical appearance- that I think is something worth striving for. So remember ladies...and men...strong women who lift weights they are those women that men ogle over in the movies. Toned, lean, confident and healthy.

6. Your muscles operate in pairs. Therefore if you work your biceps for example and not your triceps you will end in an injury. Similarly if you hold weight in your stomach your back will always be week. Furthermore men who work on their chest, arms and back and never their legs not just look disproportionate but they are also putting unnecessary pressure on the lower half of their body. Bottom line- Marvel characters can run with an excessive V shaped body humans not so comfortably.

7. Weight on a scale means nothing. Measurements are what you should go by. Why? When your measurements shrink it is because you have increased your lean muscle mass. The only concern is for women...do not measure yourself around the time of your period. Many of us bloat at this time, there's no point losing motivation over a monthly body ritual.

8. Skipping meals DOES DECREASE your metabolism and will result at some point in overeating which entirely defeats your mindset about skipping a meal in the first place. Just eat.

9. Rest days are the key to success. Rest includes things you mightn't consider as 'nothing' like walking barefoot and singing or meditating with your feet up against a wall. Without your rest days your workouts are ruined, so rest.

10. I have to work out for a long time to get the effects of exercise. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Again it depends on what you want. Yes you can easily do a few hours pumping weights no issue to have a low to medium intensity and control of your muscles is essential but if your focus is blasting fat and conditioning 3 hour gym workouts aren't for you. You need to think about what you are trying to achieve and as you are improving alter what you do. Don't start with 30 minute medium workouts if 30 minutes is easy for you- change the intensity or change the duration of your workout. Remember if it doesn't challenge you it certainly won't change you. So get sweaty!

11. I can never eat anything I want. Rubbish. You can, you just need to understand that the more you eat that has high calorific content the more you need to exercise. If you don't have time then re-evaluate your food choices.

12. Sleep. The key to nailing your life. Invest in it. I mean an expensive bed, duvet, linens, pillows all of it. Investing in your sleep will be the best investment you ever make.

Any questions? Hit me up.

Till next time...stay happy and healthy!

Jules....